Terminator: Genisys is a big ole bucket of dumb. A satchel of stupid. It's the incoherent ramblings of an alternative Terminator future storyline. There are so many plot holes through each page that the Swiss Cheese company is suing for copyright infringement. The relationships and dialogue are so bad that even George Lucas is like, "come on, dude." But, the one thing that the newest installment of the Terminator franchise has, that Jurassic World certainly did not, is that it is still a lot of fun. It's fun, due mostly to the triumphant Terminator return of Arnold Schwarzenegger.
I know that I have a bias when it comes to Arnold and I knowingly give him the benefit of the doubt even in the case of a bad movie (see: Sabotage), but look at any other review of this film and they will all say the same-- the movie sucks, but Arnold is back. All of the scenes involving this older terminator are the highlights of the film, because everything else is eye-rollingly bad. I'm not even going to try and explain the mythology of the films because all of the congruency that the previous films had is tossed haphazardly out the window in favor of an alternative timeline. So, instead of the universe we've watched in the past where a Terminator was sent back in 1984 to kill Sarah Connor and failed was then sent back again in 1992 to kill John Connor and failed... well, that happened, but it didn't actually happen. See, what actually happened is that a Terminator was sent back in the seventies when Sarah was nine and raised her like a father. She even calls him 'Pops' (face in palm). So, when Kyle Reese (Jai Courtney) is sent back by old John Connor (Jason Clarke) to protect his mother just as he did in the first movie... she already knows its going to happen and is already a badass, with a Terminator friend. However, the fact that they already know when and where everything is going to happen isn't explained... much like everything else.
So, in a case of massive redundancy, the three of them opt to stop judgement day from happening... again. I get that with a time machine, the machines can go back whenever they want as many times as they want... but with these movies there really is only one main goal-- stop judgement day from happening again and again and again. There's only so many times they can "stop" it from happening before we stop giving a shit and welcome it. So, now, essentially there's only a handful of character motivations in this timeline. First, they need Sarah and Reese to consummate their love so that John is actually born. Except, since she already knows this happens, there isn't an organic romance that spawns like in the first movie, it has to be forced. Then, there's the fighting of the Terminators against each other which we know is just a five to ten minute diversion of film because neither feels pain and neither will lose. But, it's in these moments of Arnold getting to kick ass and quip one liners and smile that hysterically creepy smile that the fun comes in. He's consistent in his portrayal of the loyal, yet stoic Terminator. And even though the idea of 'Pops' is ludicrous, he is the embodiment of a father figure for Sarah who will do anything to protect her. It's a nice relationship built around a lot of terribly built ones.
Yes, the rest of the film is terribly written and the acting isn't much better. I don't understand the appeal of Jai Courtney. He's shoved into movies on their fifth leg (he also shittily portrayed John McClane's son in the terrible fifth Die Hard) and while he does have a little bit more personality than he should, he's not that great of an actor. And while I really do like Emilia Clarke as an actress, she's not Sarah Connor. She's much too small and unfit for the role. She's as tough as she can be, but I just never believed that she's the mother of the revolution. But, even beyond that, their chemistry and their dialogue had as much romance as Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman in Star Wars. And it takes up quite a bit of the film. After awhile, I kept waiting for the inevitable Kyle Reese death to happen so we could move on from this... though it never happened. I forgot about the alternate timeline. The dialogue is also horrendous. I'm not joking when I say that one of the Terminators straight up tells Reese that he "Cannot be reasoned with" and Reese immediately responds with "Please!" That happens verbatim. I couldn't make that up.
But, even with all the ridiculous, laughable, lunacy of the storyline and the dialogue and the acting... the action combined with classic Arnold makes this film a lot of fun to watch. You're able to laugh at film without being angered (again, something Jurassic World couldn't do). There couldn't be a film further away from what James Cameron started with his first two films, and at this point, there probably won't ever be again. But, if it's mindless Arnold summer action you're after... be prepared to laugh. It's stupid... but it's the best kind of stupid you could hope for.
C
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